Father to orphans. The story of Maxim Marlyan, an orphanage houseparent

03/27/24 10:48

Father to orphans. The story of Maxim Marlyan, an orphanage houseparent

Bendery, March 27. /Novosti Pridnestrovya/. Almost 10 years ago, a man with a strong character, Maxim Marlyan, chose a job that was rare for a man. He became a houseparent in the Bendery orphanage. “People often ask me: What is your occupation? And I say: A houseparent. People don’t get this,” Maxim shares. Despite all the prejudices, he followed his own destiny and during this time he not just became a teacher for many children, but also mentor and even father.

“It’s a pity that these guys ended up in an orphanage and are walking this path. They have no one. And we, teachers, got in their way, we are companions in their lives, part of their lives. We are all one big family. I always tell my pupils: I don’t come here to work, but to live your life together with you,” the houseparent says.

Maxim Marlyan began his teaching career at school: he taught history, including to children from an orphanage. It was difficult to get along with some of them. Then Maxim Yuryevich decided that he not only wanted to teach, but also to educate these guys. “I’m the kind of person who needs to get everything under control. I felt that they needed to be looked after not only at school. I decided that I wanted to work in an orphanage, take a part-time job, and offered my candidacy,” the teacher recalls.

A male teacher in an orphanage is a rare case, and the management of the institution accommodated the young teacher. “At first it was more of an experiment called “mother and father”, so that children could feel not only female, but also male upbringing, see not only mother’s love, but also how a father, a man, should behave, and take an example from him. This experiment is still being conducted. I have come a good way and will continue to move forward,” the teacher says.

Children are subtle psychologists, they keenly feel attitude to themselves, often test people`s strength, test their boundaries, and here it is important to keep our kind and pure hearts, Maxim Yuryevich explains. During his work shift, he manages to discuss not only academic matters with his pupils, but also have a heart-to-heart talk, helps them find a way out of difficult situations, encourages, inspires and gives fatherly warmth. “Of course, children address women with the word “mother” more often. But I say: If you want to call me “father,” you can do it. For example, when the 11th grade girls were graduating, they told me: “We want to go with you in a school assembly as if you were our father.” So I led them. For me, this is a huge indicator that I can become a father to someone,” Maxim notes. Maxim’s wife Anastasia also worked in an orphanage with children for some time; one might say, she followed her husband’s example.

The Marlyan couple have been together for 5 years. They call their path to the Wedding Palace providence. “This is what should have happened anyway. This was meant to be a long time ago and the higher powers simply led us to each other,” Anastasia says. Their passing acquaintance happened at a summer health camp for children in Dubossary. Nastya worked as a counselor, while Maxim came there with his pupils from the orphanage. The first impression of each other was ambiguous. Maxim seemed arrogant to Nastya. He, on the contrary, noticed the green-eyed beauty for himself, although he did not show it. “I liked her right away, she simply bewitched me, her smile, her eyes. But there was no time to talk, we worked a lot,” the husband recalls.

That same year, after the summer camp, Anastasia decided to get a job as an organizer at the 18th Bendery school. She came to submit documents on August 15th. The girl was surprised when Maxim came into the teacher’s room and they began to congratulate him on his birthday. “Such a gift happened to me then, I saw her again,” Maxim laughs. It turned out that Maxim works at the same school as a history teacher. “That was a turn of events!” Nastya notes. The young people started to go out and celebrated the upcoming New Year together. “I told Nastya: I’ve been waiting for you for a very long time,” Maxim says with trepidation. The guys` wedding took place in a special solemn atmosphere on Bendery City Day.

Together, the couple have passed through more than one challenge. Moving to Europe was a test of their feelings. Nastya and Maxim planned to settle there for a long time. But as Anastasia says, they had to take the red tinted glasses off very quickly.

“It turned out that life is not as wonderful in other countries as we imagined. We were tired of the roads and other people's apartments and decided to settle down, stay at home, especially since we have our own home. When you're away, you have to live in other people's apartments, with other people. This is nothing compared to being at home. And work too. You cannot do something there according to your education. There you work in warehouses and factories. While you are haunted by the thought that you have two diplomas, yet you are doing such work,” Nastya shares.

After their trip, Maxim returned to work at the orphanage, while Nastya decided to develop in a different direction - to master design. Now she is taking training, Maxim supports her in this. “My husband is very good at teaching, it’s what he loves to do. He gave me the opportunity for self-realization in another area. I don’t make any money yet, Maxim is the only one who works, sometimes it is hard, of course, but he’s the kind of person, who can sacrifice himself so that I was okay. We feel each other in a special way. There is a chemistry between us, we have such a connection on a mental level that we can just finish each other's thoughts,” Nastya confesses. “I said: You must move towards your goal, I will always support you, you are the best,” Maxim adds.

The couple does not have their own children yet, but Anastasia is already proud that her husband will be a wonderful father.

 

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